Remember that commercial about the guy who gets hit by a bus, ends up in heaven with all the cookies he can eat? But when he reaches for the milk cartons, they’re empty! Ha ha, you’re not in heaven! That’s the way I kind of felt about the Delano. Upon arrival of the Delano, which is attached to the Mandalay Bay, we pull up and see a Bugatti Veyron in the valet parking. Oh yeah that’s my car. This is the kind of luxury and class and I’m looking for. Fortune may smile on me this visit after all.

It was 2 o’clock in the morning, and fortunately a valet was available to take our bags up. I walk through the front doors, between the two halves of a 62-ton metaquartzite boulder. Interesting...no fascinating! Typical Vegas, it's so sublime, and yet, how many floors can even support 62-tons, let alone have a design team split the boulder, and place it just right. To read more, click here for the Best of Vegas story. We get to the front desk, we check in, the hostess was a little snippy. I don’t mind so much I was just thinking about this cool entrance and that Bugatti. Vegas, baby Vegas! This Delano is total hipster chic that is tangible and appealing. We get up to our floor, a cool hallway, interesting photographs lining the walls with a really nice design. Old Vegas and hip desert scenics. I’m thinking this place is the bomb! My only previous brush with the Delano, pronounced Del-la-noe, as in Franklin D, US President #32, not DE-lan-no, like the Italian getaway in South Beach, Miami. That place is dope! I love that lobby bar tucked off to the side behind the 30 foot curtains flowing through the entryway. Perfect for South Beach on a perfect summer's eve.

Delano Living Room

So we get to the room, we walk in and nice! The room is decked out in soft white through and through. The wall, the flooring, the furniture. Along the left wall a good 42 inch wall-mounted TV, business desk underneath with minimalist gold legs. A comfortable looking couch with chaise. Oh look there, a wet bar! Sink, faucet, a couple of wine glasses standing on glass shelves. A mini fridge underneath. Looking good so far. Hmmm, what’s behind this door? Closet maybe? Wait, what? This is the bathroom? Theres no shower! Wait, don’t tell me, are you kidding me? A second bathroom? I’ve never been in a hotel in Las Vegas that had two bathrooms! This is awesome! I’m in heaven!

We call down to the valet to bring our bags up. He’s a very courteous guy, and interestingly enough, his name is Curtis. Really cool guy, he steps out to get us a bucket of ice. Time to chill the Courtage! That was very nice of him. I leave a nice tip. I take the bags into the curved bedroom to unzip, so I can unpack and put my clothes into the dresser drawers. I always like to make myself at home when I travel, so I completely unpack and put all my clothes in the dresser drawers...where are the drawers? Wait... where are the drawers!?! Seriously, where are the drawers!?!?! Oh oh... this ain’t heaven!

As luxurious and well laid out as this place is designed, there are no drawers here. And to add insult to injury, we open the closet doors, and it’s half the size of most Las Vegas luxury rooms. How can this be? There is one small drawer at the base of the closet, and I pull it out, it’s only about 18 inches deep. Are you kidding me? We upgraded to a scenic suite which has the cool wrap around windows, king size bed with a ultra lux headboard that was oh so visually appealing. But no drawers!

And to add additional insult to injury, there’s only one luggage rack. Of course it goes to my wife. Thank God the bed has a foot bench to put my suitcase.

We head down to the casino for a little wine down late-night action at the slots. When we come back up it’s time to hit the bed. I’m not in heaven! The bed feels like it’s been hit several times before, like, a lot of times before! wink wink! You can literally see the depression in the mattress. Looks like this they have been slept on for quite some time, and since this is Vegas, by quite a few people. Wink wink.

The next morning we wake and hit the shower. And yes, we’re not in heaven. They didn’t even spring for shower gel. Just bar soap! Can you believe it? Good thing I had my Laura Tonatto shower gel from Milan packed in my toiletries bag. Yes you never know when you’re going to need gel, even in luxury high rise hotels in Vegas.

One aspect we really did enjoy about The Hotel (get it?) is the Skyfall lounge. It's located on the 54th floor, with a private entrance, and views to die for! Since The Delano is at the southern end of the strip, you get to see all the other hotels in a single view. And in the summer, at evening, with those desert sunsets, the view is amazing. I highly recommend making reservations around 30 mins prior to sunset to get settled in for the show. We were a little, and since it was fall, a little chilly as well, and had prior reservations so we missed the show. But next summer, I'll make sure I'm on time and you'll have some nice pics.

The bar is done up in a deep blue-purple theme, with wood and neon green highlights. Think Jetsons meet Prince. There are these big bulbous globular rings that are lit internally and provide and soft ambient lighting effect. Like I said, I cant wait to check this place out at sunset and into the evening. The crowd is upscale to match the futuristic feel of the place. It seems like a great place to meet some pretty interesting, in a good way, people here. New age intellectuals channeling the ancient desert energy in a posh hot spot.

Overall, the room is built more for an overnight traveler, or ultra highrollers who don’t lug clothes around. But just buy new clothes wherever they go. If I’m a business traveler, this is perfect to have the place all to myself. But for a family man on a weekend getaway, not my bag baby. I give the Delano high marks for its design and appeall. But the lack of drawers definitely left a sour taste. Very disappointing. I did don’t feel as if I could kick back and relax. Put my feet up and sit a spell, not with my clothes still sitting in their bag. I’m sorry Delano, I call this one, one and done. It’s not you, it’s me.